I love TED talks.

And after working through a public speaking phobia I love speaking.  One of my dreams is to speak at a TEDx event.

I even used speaking at TEDx as an example in my How to Manifest video from 2012..

So you can imagine my excitement yesterday morning when I was getting ready to go to my first TEDx event, TEDxUbud!

I felt a bit ridiculous getting onTEDxUbud Kirsten my motorbike in a long dress and who wants windblown helmet hair. But, when in Bali… Haha!  At the same time I kinda felt like a princess being swept err scooted off to one of her dream events.

On the road…

I’m cruising with plenty of time to spare, exchanging smiles with the locals & only have one last right hand turn to make.  But this is Bali… and well, there’s not necessarily street signs for all the streets.  Or any of the streets that I could possibly turn right on.  Plus are these really streets?  Or driveways?  Or alleys?  Or “gangs”?  So I begin making random rights, speaking mostly in body language with locals for help and then heading back to the main road when it’s obvious I’m going the wrong way.  Rinse, repeat.

Then finally I see the correct street name!!  You’d think that was promising.  Up that street, and back I go.  Oh snap, the next street has the same name!  Hilarious.  So up that street and dead end.  I am so grateful that my iPhone has GPS on it that will always show me where I am on a map, regardless of wifi.  But another challenge enters.

The map is wrong.  

Google map fails too.  There is just not a street to continue on that my lovely magical venue is supposed to be on, just a block or two down.  But I see a gorgeous path!  A path in the rice fields that in no way could be where a shuttle full of TEDx’ers were also arriving.

By this point I had already decided to enjoy my morning regardless of where I am.  

So I said eff it and cruised out into the beautiful rice fields on this 2 foot dirt path.  The sun was shining, palm trees swaying and butterflies were fluttering by.  Somewhere around the very first dead end, I had had a mini awakening.  I noticed I was getting anxious, because I really wanted to get to TEDxUbud on time.

When I’m attached to outcomes I invite fear in.

I’m not in the outcome business, despite occasionally deluding myself to the contrary.  So the question becomes, “Do I desire an outcome or do I want peace of mind?”

While getting ready for the event I was listening to Marianne Williamson’s A Return To Love.  When I bumped into stress & anxiety at the first dead end, some of her words popped in my head:

“Make peace of mind your goal.”

And just like that I did.  I decided I want to cruise stress-free and surrendered even finding the event at all.  It’s like deciding whether the journey or the destination is the priority.  And I picked the journey, the present moment.

I thoroughly enjoyed almost TEDxUbud Kirstenevery minute of the hour that I was late to TEDxUbud.  It became comical how lost I was, how wrong the map was, and how helpful that Balinese tried to be but to no avail.

There may be times where inner peace is too far of a reach from whatever situation or emotion you are in.  It is also true that in every moment, we have a choice…

We can chose to let go of the outcome, which aims us towards peace of mind.

The best part about being late is that the joy I found while being lost inspired me to make a video for you.

I hope that when you are lost you find the same – that you wake up from the dead end stress & anxiety to joy & peace: )

I’d love to hear from you! Please share your thoughts below in the comments  Xx

Love Kirsten

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